Hi guys, uuhhm… I’ve been gone for how many days now? 😔 Was kinda Ill but I feel better now. So yesternight just as I was checking social media for happenings around the world, I came across an interesting piece on feminism. Some of the things I didn’t quite agree with.
I did a piece on that and gender equality sometime ago here>>Pros & Cons of Gender Equality. You can also share your thoughts.
Back to our discussion, I think some of the points I read were a bit too far, I’m going to share my take on some and I’ll like to know your thoughts too. The said piece was written by a famous US-based Nigerian author on feminism and feminism seems to be the most talked about subject on social media nowadays. I love and respect Chimamanda somuch and she’s an amazing writer. Whatever ideology she has about feminism, with her position and influence, a lot of people will buy without scrutiny or questions. But I have some reservations on some,
Here they are…
• On gender roles/cooking: I’m so traditional on this. I mean, every woman should be glad to cook and feed her family and shouldn’t see it as a burden. That doesn’t mean the men are totally excluded from cooking but it shouldn’t debated. Are we switching gender roles or are we saying the man should be as responsible for cooking as the woman? Do you agree with this? In as much as the man cooks as need be, as a woman, I grew up in a traditional setting to know that it is joyful to prepare family meals and feed the family. You can imagine my joy during meal times as we enjoy our meals. And somebody is saying what again? Please speak for yourself Biko, in this case I refuse to be a ‘modern’ girl. Though this shouldn’t be a pre-requisite to define who a woman is.
• On changing your last name when you get married: So someone argues that if the man cannot change his last name to the woman’s, why should the woman? Really? Ok I get the bias… As a lady, you go through school bearing your father’s name, perhaps have gained fame with it in your career or maybe its your brand, then you decide to keep it. It’s your choice. What’s the point of making people who would like to take their husband’s last name when they get married feel like it’s a crime? Or perhaps those who did are brainless? It is the normal thing to do whether fame or not except otherwise it’s a choice between you and your husband fullstop!
• On who’s the head of the home/submission: I do not accept the rebellious idea of rivalry which basically I think denying the leadership role of the man in the home is. The man is the shepherd and the woman is to be supportive and submissive. Not in responding to his every wish and command or the man lording over her according to his personal desires, but as is commanded by God. ( 1Pet3:1a).
Submission doesn’t mean you give up your brain and take on the man’s own or live in fear. Or to the man that you lord over her like a child or a slave,( This is where terror & rebel emanates when you misuse your position and are bent on doing your will). Submission is mutual. The man loves the woman, bears her burdens, carry her cares, meet her needs, etc. And the woman does the same.
For the men who harass innocent women, forcing their will on them, stop it! That’s slavery not submission. If you cannot love her like the Bible instructed, why are you forcing submission? Don’t skip your part, play it!
There seems to be to me, a lot of misguided thoughts on feminism which I think is taking its toll on the society. Sometimes I choose not to voice my opinion but I mean…
In the actual sense, we are all created unique. Your values and the other person’s values might not be the same and no one should make any one feel uneasy on their choices be it anyone. While some people have chosen to be celibate for life and have gone ahead to become Reverend sisters or Fathers, have you?
God made orderliness in all areas of human activity. Government, family, school, even in the church.
On feminism, how much is really too far?